lost (poem)

there is no use lying to the one you kneel for

what i mean is, we’ve knelt at each other’s feet until we were once again eye level

this is no place for shame

yet im suffocated in it

intestines soaked in the acid of detachment

i was so close to dying no less than three feet away

second always to your fake drowning

smiling at me, hushing me- saying this is safe

no real place for such talk 

we’ve other taboos to taste

to devour and confirm their virtue before we’re told our bodies we’re sin

or saved

i’ll always look after you

even when it never meant anything 

even when the ending was predictable 

hate never gave me the strength to leave

only fester

it’s my fault for engaging,

for allowing you to safety net me

the echo of the walls says i should’ve known better

the empty of the room felt better than reaching for you