devour (poem)

I'd devour you if you were of any nutrient to me

tasteless and empty in life, even the fire could not season you

it’s anesthesia, numbing to sleep

          numbing the body

hard to wake molasses blood enough to sludge to my brain    mouth chained shut, you’ve rendered me harmless

docile

after all this time, I’ve forgiven your aphasia 

it’s never your fault to sink grey matter in nicotine acid, is it?

fermente it until it's unusable

your grip sustains withal

I do not know the language that will release me from your hold

I’m versed in sweet magic 

the crystallized sugar dusting every edible flower is made of my passion’s shiver

and you’ve drained me

    an iv from me into your bloodstream

no stomach acid nor plasma wasted

tell me again you’ll love out all the poison 

    it's the sweetest of your lies

    the best tasting of the bile you spew 

tell me again-

    it’s lullaby and I’m waiting for permission to rest

    call me incapacitated venus flytrap

    anemia-weak and bone twitching exhaustion

    and hope I never wake